Tuesday, September 29, 2009

From The Diary of Miss May E. Thigpen Upon Meeting Her Nephew



I saw my baby nephew for the first time yesterday.
He is beautiful. We all say he is beautiful! He is perfect. He looks like a changeling, with his very serious face, those hooded eyes and very important eyebrows. His nose is like a cupcake turned upside down and his little mouth is full on top and tucked lower lip that gets dragged into the tiny knob of his chin by his heavy, dewy cheeks. He is pink, and has long, long fingers. His legs are long as well like a jumping frog with the same narrow hips and his feet have prominent heels and monkey toes. His ears make me think of shells cut crossways, or maybe just one perfect nautilus in half because they match of course and are on either sides of his noggin in just the right places. They are soft and have good lobes. Mama says he bleats like a goat when he is squalling, but I think he sounds like a boy. I have not looked overmuch at his tummy but I suspect it too, is perfect.
It was the strangest feeling to hold him. He is not my boy, but he is my blood, and it was more like looking into my sister's face than just any other baby. Jason said when he first saw him, his heart just dropped. I was not so much aware of my heart but more like I'd been missing something and here he was. Sometimes we talk about Jessie, and how she was an accident, but we can't imagine our lives without her- that yawning space she would leave without us ever knowing how empty we were. Here it is again. Hello. Here you are. We've been waiting for you, little man.
To speak of him in the clumsy words we have and to give the full weight of how I feel about him I would have to say I am in love with this boy. Then if you were to say Well, if you love him so much why don't you marry him? I'd say, Shut up, You Stupid Fool. I already have.

9 comments:

Ms. Moon said...

We all have. He is the groom we have been waiting for and he has married us all in another ceremony of life and love and light.
Your words are beautiful. So are you. I love you.

That Hank said...

I wonder what his sense of humor will be like.

Petit fleur said...

May! You are so funny honey!

You want to know something weird... Marc described his feeling about Griffin in the same way. Perhaps even using the same words! "I'd been missing something and here he was". There must be some universal type truth to this feeling. So great you can identify it.

Much love Auntie May (Dangerously close to Auntie Mame! I've always wanted one of those!!)

Sarcastic Bastard said...

May,
I love that photo of the two of you, and yes, your hair DOES look smashing.

This post is adorable and so are you.

Goddammit, I want to hold Owen.

Love, SB.

Steph(anie) said...

Owen is perfect and he is lucky to have such an amazing family! Much love.

Mwa said...

That baby was always going to be beautiful.

May said...

Mama- We are all married, we are all beautiful. I love you. And I love my new pictures! I changes the one for this post, it is subtly different. I'm feeling well, by the way, but I'm working a double today (which is why I'm replying to your email here) so I have to go back to work in a minute. How is the little family today?

DTG- Me too! I bet it will be a good one. I know that I'm a lot funnier than I would be if I was in a different family.

Petit Fleur- I was just thinking the other day about how I want to be Auntie Mame! Fishberry jam, anyone?
And yeah, that feeling of finding a missing piece makes me believe a little more in reincarnation. Some people are just so familiar and so right.

SB- Thanks love! Come on down here and hold him! He'll be even cuter as he ripens.

Steph- Thank you! Yes, he is perfect as all babies we love are perfect. Love just washes our eyes clean, doesn't it?

Mwa- That really touched me. You're absolutely right.

Ms. Moon said...

The little family is good. I got to take a nap with Mr. Baby today and it was heaven with honey.
But I'm worried about you- a double? OH darling.

Elizabeth said...

That is a beautiful photo -- of you and the baby.